The commercials of MTV’s 1985 Top 100 Countdown

Truth be told, I knew what most of MTV’s top 100 videos of 1985 were before I even sat down to watch the eight-plus hours recording that was uploaded to the Internet Archive earlier this year. Bootlegs of this specific countdown have been circulating for a while, and you could find lists of it online no problem at all. Based on those lists, you could easily watch over 90 of the videos on YouTube at anytime, and with much better video and sound quality as well.

But that’s not fun at all! Because while it’s great to sit down and revisit some classic 80s tunes, the real joy of watching the original broadcast of the countdown isn’t just in the music videos, it’s in everything that surrounded it.

MTV’s Top 100 Countdown traditionally aired on New Year’s Eve (with the occasional repeat in the days following). And, in the very early days of MTV, New Year’s Eve was a big freaking deal, with the network putting on a televised concert to celebrate. New Year’s Eve 1985 was no exception, so throughout the countdown the VJs (either Martha Quinn or Mark Goodman) would cut to Alan Hunter, who would report live from the concert venue to give frequent updates.

 

 

These updates are often haphazard at best and other times just awkward and embarrassing as hell. They’re great. Alan is very obviously trying to fill time with no script or teleprompter. He talks about the caterers and delivers an update right when the a drum tech starts a sound check. Fantastic timing, Alan. He fucks around with some poor roadies who probably just want to get away from the damn camera and set up some cables, and gives very forced interviews with The Hooters, Divinyls, Charlie Sexton and a very over it Grace Slick who shits on her band’s revolving door line-up before making jokes about diarrhea. I’ll be real, it made me like Starship just a bit.

Grace also shows up for a hot second in a “Happy Near Year” bumper, with hair that goes all way into 1987.

 

 

Of course, the best part about digging up any old TV recording is the commercials, and this recording was no exception, lots of gems buried here. Of course, there were some more famous commercials, like this unforgettably bizarre Sony ad that was already uploaded to YouTube many times over.

But there were a few other commercials that I think have been lost to time, some good ones too. For example, Dr. Pepper used the countdown to showcase all four of their oddly high-budget sci-fi “The Taste for Out Of Ordinary Bodies” ad campaign. I think that these commercials, often with massive sets and decent special effects, would not have happened if Apple hadn’t dropped their 1984 commercial earlier in the year. Many of them have the vague aura of Apple’s anti-authoritarian message (which is hella ironic now) but filtered down a 100 million times over to be as commercial and capitalist as possible. I love them all.

 

 

There are also two very strange commercials that I think were made specifically for the countdown, or at the very least they were made only to air on MTV. They are fake music videos, long commercials with original music, presented as a music video first, and an ad for a product second. If someone told me such a thing existed back in the 80s, I would have guessed that music-focused brands like Sony, or something super image focused like a car company, would have tried their hand at them.

I would not have guessed that the American Sewing Association would have given them a go.

 

 

This is just…so bizarre. I suppose that the ASA’s reasoning was that a lot of teenage girls watch MTV and want to look like the singers they love, so maybe they’d pick up sewing so they could copy their favorite styles? That’s a hell of a stretch. All the teenage girls in 1985 who wanted to look like Madonna probably just bought faux-Madonna outfits at the mall, I’d imagine.

This ad is so ambitious. An original song, a large cast, so much effort, so much time, but obviously not much money. I imagine someone pitched this idea to an executive, who then said “I love it!” but when the budget came in they were like “hey now.” I bet they went into this hoping they’d make a knock-off Bangels video but instead ended up making a Laura Branigan video.

Such budget concerns were obviously not a concern for Campbell’s Soup, who also turned out a fake music video/PSA/commercial that aired multiple times during the countdown. But they took that shit to the next level.

 

 

Campbell’s “Do It Right” commercial is two minutes long, featuring a very large cast of incredibly talented dancers, multiple locations, and a full band performing a complete, original song (complete with an 80s sax solo). The commercial itself really doesn’t advertise soup though, it’s more of a catch-all PSA covering just about issue that a PSA would, including drugs and alcohol, maintaining a positive attitude, and, of course, waking up early and sticking to a healthy diet which no doubt includes Campbell’s Soup.

The song is deviously catchy and I legitimately like it more than some of the weaker tracks that actually appear on the countdown. Seriously, take out either Mick Jagger solo abomination that managed to sneak it’s way on the Top 100 and replace it with this.

This was filmed at Muhlenberg College in Allentown, Pennsylvania. I know this because some intrepid school reporter at Muhlenberg wrote a fantastic piece celebrating the 30th anniversary of the commercial’s filming. According to the article, the band in the video is On The Edge, and I sadly cannot find anything else about them. It’s safe to say that they never “made it” but this is a slick, well-produced song that successfully copied the pop-rock style at the time. I would not be surprised if someone involved in its creation went on to some modicum of success behind the scenes or in another band.

In addition to the commercials posing as PSAs posing as music videos, a few actual PSAs made their way onto the countdown’s commercial breaks as well.

 

 

It used to be that you couldn’t watch a 30 minute block of TV aimed at kids without McGruff the Crime Dog telling you to “take a bite out of crime.” While some anti-crime initiatives of the 80s have aged poorly (DARE comes to mind) the National Crime Prevention Council’s aims with McGruff seem to be much less problematic. This commercial is about bike thieves, and I think everyone can agree that bike thieves suck. You know who really hates bike thieves? Blue-haired old ladies with GIANT WALKIE-TALKIES. Defund the police. Fund grannies with gargantuan walkie-talkies.

Another PSA that aired a lot during the countdown was this one by the People For The American Way. It’s really vague, (kind of like the organization’s name) and just speaks in very broad platitudes about the importance of freedom of expression. Seeing this commercial, it’s clear that PFAW are a political organization, but it’s really hard to gleam exactly what they’re trying to accomplish. I sure as hell couldn’t and I had never heard of the group before seeing this ad.

 

 

Turns out that the group is an ultra-progressive advocacy group founded by Norman Lear, the creator of All In the Family! Huh. And if you haven’t heard of them, you’ve probably heard of their most well-known initiative, Right Wing Watch. That’s right, the watchdog group that got InfoWars taken off of YouTube started as a reaction by the creator of All In The Family to the Regan Administration, and they used to air ads on MTV. I’m sure the right-wing equivalent stuck to VH1.

All this stuff is great, but the real commercial cream of the crop that I found on these recordings were all the local ones. Whoever it was who recorded this countdown apparently lived in the greater Philadelphia area, so we’re treated with a smorgasbord of bizarre, hilarious, and incredibly cheap ads for various businesses located in the Philly ‘burbs.

 

 

My favorite of this bunch is this video store ad. The era of the independent video store will always hold a place in my heart. My family owned a store that I bet was a lot like this one. Sadly, there are so few commercials like this one archived online. There are plenty for Blockbuster and other chains, but none for the small local shops, the types of places that people actually have nostalgia for. This place seemed great. I only wish the video quality was a bit better so I could more easily make out the movies on display. That’s something I have a knack for. I was only able to make out a copy of Blues Brothers, Blazing Saddles, and My Favorite Year.

 

 

Another easy highlight among the local batch of ads is this 30 second piece advertising a local computer store. There’s so much to take in here. While the narrator describes the various personal and business-focused aspects of the company, the video footage is almost entirely of computer games. One of the games appears to be an early strip poker title! If anyone knows the name of that one, be sure to let me know on Twitter. The commercial also touts that the store has a software rental program, which is great, but most assuredly illegal, even back then. Wow.

This is just the tip of the iceberg. There were even more unique and weird commercials on the countdown that I put up on my YouTube channel. Head over there to check them out. I’m a fan of the Aerobic Club ad that’s so 80s that it looks like a fake commercial made for an Adult Swim bit or a Vaporwave video. The local PSAs are pretty funny too.

I sincerely hope to get the final part of this up before New Year’s! But if I miss that deadline due to alcohol and sadness, I’ll probably have it up by the weekend following the holiday. No promises, but I’ll do my best!